Alimony

Alimony, technically speaking, alimony is the order of payment for the support or maintenance of a spouse or former spouse, periodically or in a lump sum, for a specified or for an indefinite term, ordered in an action for divorce, Basically, alimony is the money one ex-spouse is legally required to give to the other in a divorce or separation agreement. Alimony law varies from state to state, and often the amount of alimony rests completely upon the judge's discretion. Unlike child support guidelines that are mandated by each state, alimony guidelines are few and far between with the judge's discretion holding the most clout. The method of alimony payment varies also by the state in which the divorce settlement is reached. Most states allow a lump-sum payment, equal to the total alimony amount expected over a period of years. Monthly dispersion is another method of alimony payments, but few people prefer to wait for a check in the mail. Most people receiving alimony choose the lump sum for the simple reason that it brings closure to the proceedings and relations can be severed, if necessary, with the ex-spouse. According to the latest census data Alimony is only awarded in 12% of divorces and it is becoming a thing of the past. (Two income earners and most if not all members of the households working) Now let me get on a soap box on my feeling about it, I do not believe in it, I did not ask for it in my divorce (I was entitled to it) and I think UNLESS there are HUGE circumstance such as small children, domestic violence, or a disability then it should not happen. WHY you ask? It is a hand out! When a partnership of any type is resolved the business end, so does a marriage now in marriage you have perhaps other things to worry about such as children, Child support is different and I believe that child support should happen for the children, however Alimony is for the partnership and that needs to go away. Frankly from my own experience only one type of women even ask for alimony the rest of us say no. The one's who feel like it is an entitlement, the one's who were born into money or felt like the deserved it for some other reason; like they were wronged in the marriage so they want revenge. Ladies and even gentlemen now are able to ask for alimony. Frankly I think it is an old law that should have gone out with the horse and buggy. For you women out there who get it, believe me I know who you are really. The one's who want the final stab at the man, the one's who want in money form what you will never get back again in any other form and ladies you are a sad, sad bunch.....

pro-choice or anti-women

I am pro-choice and it makes me VERY upset when an organization stops helping another for a political reason not for any other. The Susan G Komen Is the largest organization behind the cure for breast cancer and what they did yesterday for women was SHAMEFUL!!! It makes me VERY upset, I will no longer support SGK ever again, Planned Parenthood performs LESS than 12% of all abortion and gets the blame for all of them and they do SO much great work for poor and uninsured. It's very very sad and make me SO angry. I volunteered for Planned Parenthood for years, I still think it was one of the best uses of my time and the best eye opening experience I ever had! He is a link on the truth of why they stopped funding.

http://maddowblog.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/02/02/10299999-the-story-behind-komens-cut-off

Also here is a few words on pro-choice from one of my favorite people. “Boy, these conservatives are really something, aren't they? They're all in favor of the unborn. They will do anything for the unborn. But once you're born, you're on your own. Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with fetus from conception to nine months. After that, they don't want to know about you. They don't want to hear from you. No nothing. No neonatal care, no day care, no head start, no school lunch, no food stamps, no welfare, no nothing, your fucked. Conservatives don't give a shit about you until you reach “military age” Then they think you are just fine. Just what they've been looking for. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. Pro-life.. Pro-life these people aren't pro-life, they're in favor of killing doctors that perform abortions what kind of pro life is that? What, they'll do anything they can to save a fetus but if it grows up to be a doctor they might have to kill it. They're not pro-life. You know what they are? They are anti-women. Simple as it gets, anti -women. They don't like them. They don't like women. They believe a woman’s primary role is to function as a brood mare for the state.” George Carlin

We we need me for president!

Okay once again back to why I need to be president. I have skeletons in my closet. I have lied and will lie when I think the information I have is more hurtful than helpful, period. So everyone wonders why we have no good candidates it starts with you! We have to have good officials to begin with. We don't then and it's our own faults because most of us would rather sit back and complain than get off our facebook, gameplaying, snacking, fast fooding butts then go vote or run for office. Now back to where I stand on the issue and I'm guessing where the majority of people stand on the issues.
Obama: He needs to go; he has done nothing he said he was going to do, plain and simple, the economy is worse, healthcare is worse, the general state of the United States is worse. He needs to go, he is a Chicago politician who can go back to Chicago and collect his union kickbacks.
Economy: It sucks its in the tank and there are many articles out there on how more more we are paying since Obama is in office, for things like gas, bacon, and beef. First of all we need to balance the budget spend within limits and set a reasonable and responsible budget. Get some good people in the budget office who know numbers not simple see money signs. Lets put accounts in the accounting office lets try that.
Congress & Senate: TERM LIMITS and lower pay; the average citizen makes 45,000 a year congress can keep the perks but cut the pay, you can even leave in the retirement, they still in perks and benefits will make a nice living. 2 term max. We need new ideas to move America forward, two terms and done. I'd be happy if I worked for 8-12 years then got a guaranteed retirement of 45,000 a year they should be too!
Healthcare: National Healthcare needs to happen but it needs not to be a welfare state it needs to be a buy in will already existing companies, many states have programs like these already so why are we trying to re-invent the wheel? Just open these already existing programs to all.
Drug Screenings: I have to take a Drug screening to get any job then you should have to get one to get any sort of welfare, period, this is really a no brainier.
Language: Okay this whole national language movement is a little confusing to me since America is supposed to be the melting pot right, however English seems to prevail, then lets make it English and my thinking is simply this, when you go hunting and see no trespassing sign what language are they in? (English)
Welfare: The welfare system has been overhauled a lot lately and its getting better but it's still be abused by some and still others struggle, there has to be a better way the cut off charts don't seem to account for every thing.
Jobs: There are a lot of things in America that need repair and a lot of people out of work we need a job bill, one that hasn't been seen in years, what happened to the welfare to work programs? What happened to the prison work programs? Why do have prisoners sitting in jails earning degree's instead of digging ditches? Lets look at not only basic road, bride and infrastructure repair but who can do it.
Prison system: Revamp it, why are the majority of prisoners in prison on drug charges? Why is rehabilitation failing?
Drugs: They are a source of income, legalize them and prostitution as well, collect taxes on them, save our police force work and collect the benefits from it.
Religion: NO national religion America was based on freedom of religion, that means all or no religions must be respected and honored.
Immigration: Okay this one for me is simple there is a legal way to become a citizen of the United States USE it, I have NO sympathy or tolerance for Illegal immigrants when the process to become legal is not that hard. No to illegal immigrant tuition and no to illegal immigrants on welfare, we have our own to take care of and that’s more than enough. No what does need to happen is perhaps more Workers to help inform and help immigrants through the legal process.
Foreign Policy: In the age of globalization America can not afford to become isolationist we have made ourselves the world police force and the worlds helpers. What we need to do is step out and start really putting ourselves out there for those who we said we would protect and those who owe us, we need to start collecting we are not a bank and we need to start collecting.
Marriage: Notice I did not say gay or same sex marriage; I said marriage I think marriage needs to redefined the majority of American adults live together without the benefit of marriage now, what does that say about society and commitment? What does that say about our view of the world? It’s changing and our definitions MUST change with it! Marriage must be redefined, all couples must have some safety and security in relationships, perhaps there needs to be a common law after 6 months for all. Man and man; women and women, and man and women.
Abortions, Sex-Ed and the “B” plan: Thanks to modern medical advancements the definition of when life begins is going to be decided once and for all very soon, however and up until the date and even after that date abortions will be an issue, women have had a choice in this country for almost forty years, women simply by virtue of being the one's who carry the young get to make this choice. Now to lower abortion rates place true sexual education back in all school systems so that everyone knows and understands the choices they have. Also in birth control you have to include the morning after pill for those who were not smart enough to make the correct choice from the beginning or who were unable to make that choice.
Web Censorship: This is a Freedom of Speech it needs to stay free and quite honestly if you don't like what's on the web don't be on it, no one is forcing you on.
Keystone Pipeline: Obama screwed this one up, yes it protects the environment sort off, but at some point there has to be a balance between environment, jobs and just plain common sense, gas prices would have gone down, it would have put thousands of unskilled people in the workforce and it didn't happen, sorry big screw up.
School Lunches: Over the last twenty years school lunches and nutrition has become something of a joke, this is a simple fix but no one wants it; stop outsourcing these lunches!!! Make the schools once again responsible for cooking, planning ,preparing and cleaning up after these meals. This puts some semi-skilled workers back to work. This gets kids eat meals that are not half cold and taste like crap. This cuts down on the fat and calorie content. Make good home cooked food period! Make kids understand portions and portion controls and how to eat correctly and give the kids time to sit and eat lunches not the 20 minutes dine and dashes that are occurring in schools today. It is shameful.
Space: The Untied states once lead the world in the exploration of space and we have had set back huge scary set backs, The global moon project is not what we need, what needs to happen is a bigger than that the United states needs to start really thinking how to make Space a true venue for Exploration not just exploitation of payloads. How do we go to the moon again and mars and beyond? How does this happen? What is going to make this happen?
Airlines and TSA: The airline industry is the safest way to travel and yet it is 20 years behind the times, the radar system are barely out of the Vietnam era when we have technology on our desks that get updated yearly; What is wrong with this? Why do we not demand better? This industry also needs an overhaul. The TSA has done a job since September 11th and much like police it is a thankless job we only hear about them when something bad happens not when something good happens. How many terror attacks did they prevent? Ask yourself that the next time your complaining you have to take your shoes off!

Abortion

Well today is the 39th anniversary of Roe vs. Wade and I want to talk about Choice. I know some of my friends this will upset and for that I apologize However my beliefs and what I say often upset people. I not very often say things when my Christian friends post and I am offend, or when sweet things get posted about mothers since I do not have a relationship with mine. I do not post Daily Atheist posting nor do I have any plans to begin, I would not dare post a cartoon about abortion because not only is it offense to women who have had one but frankly it is bad taste. The line between when life begin gets thinner and blurrier every year and frankly with modern science soon that line will have a clear date. However if you don't walk a mile in someone else's shoes then you have NO RIGHT TO judge; Sorry Sarah I am calling you out on this one and challenging you, spend 1 year volunteering at Planned Parenthood THEN and only then can you post the garbage you did today! I have volunteered there and let me tell you I have seen THE absolute worst of Christianity. I have been spit on, called names, had garbage thrown on me and walked women and me of all ages in the clinic; some of these were children scared, the looks on these faces were of no hope. Now I have also seen the best of Humanist and Christians but I also know that no one is above being a hypocrite. Again I ask EVERYONE to walk a mile in someone else's shoes before you judge. On my wrist you often find a purple bracelet that says “Trust Women” I am pro choice not because I support abortion and think that all women should have one and that it should be used as birth control but that I think it needs to stay LEGAL for women who have NO other choice. An unplanned pregnancy is a horrible thing to face and so many women face this alone and afraid. The other thing I want to talk about today is birth control SO many forms of birth control are considered illegal under certain states anti-abortion legislations and most voters don’t even know it. Birth control is the simple way to prevent abortions. WE need to educate on birth control TEACH it in the schools again, teenagers will have sex; birth control education is NOT permission but prevention. Let’s get it back into the schools. Adoption is also something else that needs to be brought up every talks about adoption and abortion like its one or the other it's not and the LOWEST majority or adoptive parents are white middle-class christian' (This is a fact you can spend about 5 minutes researching adoption numbers to find out it's true!) The majority of children end up in the foster care system that has it's own problems. For those who do get adopted great for the others it is a VERY hard life. IF you work Foster care you know! You want to prevent abortion then we need education, it is the answer plain and simple and education will not happen with the closed minded wanting sex education out of the schools. I know I am on a soapbox but I really tired of not offending people and keeping my mouth shut, if I offend you so what! Closed minded hate mongers offend me!

Two years

So its been two years that Troy and I have been together today is our anniversary sort of.(more or less) I think back two years doesn't seem that long ago and in other ways it seems like a life time ago. I look back and go over things because I am a sap like that. I look at the emails we sent, I think about our first “date” at the Outback I think about the first time he cooked me diner. The first time I was at his house I'm not sure who was more nervous he or me? I think about how we almost ended before we started with his move, how hard of a choice it was for me to move. I think about how hard I am to love sometimes, how I want everything my way and I can be very passive aggressive. I want things my way. I also can be very needy in a relationship I want attention a lot, I want to know I'm needed and loved. For someone to deal with this on a daily ongoing basis and not go insane must be a very special person. Then there is my other issues, my family who are not always the most supportive people in the universe, my kids who I share with my ex-husband, my ex-husband who is not entirely over me and tries to be a pain, my health which is never good and at times scary terrible. The person to love me but also to deal with all of this has to be incredible and he is. I do get upset with him occasionally and he's not perfect but I don't want perfect. I wanted real and I wanted a partner and I found that. He makes me laugh and smile. He makes me look forward to the future. He makes me happy and above all else he loves me.

A single phone call

With a single phone call today, I was reminded today that it the anniversary of my Grandfathers death. I really could have gone all day without that knowledge. His Death turned into a HUGE turning point in my life. Now I would go back in a heart beat and give almost anything to be at some of those times in his life that I missed; like his 80th birthday party. I had just started a new job with Kindercare (made great friends but NOT a great company to work for) and had no time off to take. His death was really the first death my children had to deal with with and my youngest Ryker took it very, very hard. The drive to Minnesota and the back was one of the worst of my life, it was snowing, and on the way home the kids were horribly sick, we stopped and pulled over countless times for them to puke. It was an awful time, one of the 3 times in a 14 year marriage my ex-husband went to Minnesota with me. The drive was long, cold, emotional and unpleasant to say the least. However I went because my Grandparents are very important to me, more so than my parents even at times. I was very lucky in a lot of ways, I got to spend time with my grandfather when he was still driving his 18 wheeler; I was a prissy girl to say the least but went in that truck; and for those of you that can remember it The Boardwalk (That used to be in Colorado Springs) all that moss rock outside my grandfather laid with his two hands. He was a simple hard working man. My family (on my mother side) is very lucky in a lot of ways because there are a lot of us, a lot of kids, grand kids and great grand kids and grandpa got to see them and spend time with them. Mostly I think he watched us and wondered what the hell did he get himself into because he was always so quiet and just watched everyone. My family is also like most with it share of Drama at time HUGE amounts. (Yes I will blame my mother for the majority of it thank you VERY much!) However thinking back to 3 years ago and all the change that single event brought into my life amazes me. I no longer live in Fountain, I thought I'd live there forever, I got out of an unhappy marriage I thought I'd never have the courage to leave, I finished up my Master's Degree. Now there are things I also wish didn't happen. I HATE, HATE sharing custody of my kids. I dislike the drift in my family, (again I blame my mother) & although we have had our own issues at times I miss my own father who is fading away from the world and reality. I can remember headed to work and getting the phone call. That single phone call changed so many things. You truly never know. So go find someone hug them and tell them you love them!

The Cruise was so great!

SO how was the cruise? The cruise was so great!!! To start off with the ride to the harbor went Flawlessly thanks to our dear friend Mr. Chris Brown who also was kind enough to pick us up from the port as well. The staff at Baltimore Harbor really have it together. We got unloaded, and on ship within an hour. Getting on ship so fast our room was not ready yet. So we headed to the Lido deck and the lunch buffet. Now for whatever reason; I remember the food being better. IT wasn't bad but it was average buffet food. Got to our room which was not huge by any means but nice sized for a room on a ship. It had a king sized bed, a couch and a Balcony. The full sized bathroom did not included a bathtub but that's ok. The added cost would not have been worth the tub. Now for anyone who has been on a cruise knows you have to do the drill, which means putting on your life vest and going to your station. Now because of the temperature we just had to go to our station and not put on the vests. It was quick and painless. Then back to our room. Got to meet our Room Stewart “Prapa” she was a doll! Always; always called us by name! No Luggage yet but not worried about it. Our first nights sit down dinner was again ok. I had to ask for more bread and water (Not good when I have to ask for things!) The appetizer and desert was good the main course was just ok. Our Table mates were interesting couples, One was a couple on their anniversary and the other was a couple a bit younger than us from New Jersey. We watched the ship depart the dock and I think I took some very good pictures of the underside of the bay bridge. Then off to bed for the first night. The 1st full day at sea. Breakfast was better however the dining staff still not thrilling me. It is still pretty cold so no pool or deck today. Played some Bingo. Had lunch in the Dinning room versus the buffet not impressing us yet. Went to an Art Auction. This was great, bought some new art for the Dining room! This was also the Captains Dinner Night so it meant Dress Up!!! I got to wear my Formal Dress which I loved! We took some Pictures which did not turn out so great, didn't keep those. Went and say a show Called Vroom, Not bad kind of a History of Music told by a Roadie. Then went to see Comedian Al Ernst; He wasn't bad, however making fun of the TSA is like shooting Fish in a Barrel. Day Two at sea was sort of the Day for Us we played another game of Bingo, Dressed up again for Dinner and these are the picture that are posted on Facebook. Had Dinner at the Steakhouse, The Steakhouse was great! My only issue with it at all was the cost was not included in the cost of the cruise so it was an extra $60 however it was worth it. After that we went to a Physical Comedy show and called it an early Night. Day 3 Port Canaveral, Florida; So being huge tech geeks I have to say it was funny that one of the most exciting things about being in Florida was the ability to use our phone's. Since we had both done a lot in Florida we choose to stay on ship. We hit the Adult retreat with bathing suits and books! The swimming pool was ICE cold, not just COLD but FREEZE YOUR GENTILS COLD! I understand the ship recycles the ocean water for the pools but really heating it a bit more would help. So after freezing for a split second I went straight to the Hot Tub. Lots of sunning and Reading. Discovered a Drink called a Mocha Chocolate Experience IT was like a cold hot Cocoa with Alcohol so needless to say this was my favorite drink on the trip! Went to Dinner still not impressed. (Now I say this as the staff is very obviously afraid of me now, making sure my water is always full and I always have bread; however the main course is still just ok) Then off to another show called its a wonderful world. The show was very cute although not altogether Politically Correct however it was cute. Then Deck Party!! This was my highlight for the entire cruise was getting Troy to Dance with me!!! The deck party itself was a little insane and at times people made me crazy. Too many kids and the Guy who wet himself plus the couple who were hanging all over other people we just a few of the things I could have done without. However Getting Troy to Conga and Dance with ME!! PERFECT! Then onto Nassau; Now Nassau was not a great day and mostly I take the blame for that one. So packing for this trip I pack 4 pairs of shoes including a pair of flats but do I spend the extra time to find my good TEVA hiking sandals? (That’s a no) So then I get up in the middle of the night and stub my toe and take a layer of skin with it on the table. (Graceful me) So I cant wear my flats as they are rubbing my toe raw. SO I go with my High heeled sandals to walk the cobblestone streets of Nassau. Needless to say between my arthritis, my sciatica, plus my asthma because of all the smoke from god knows what I had to use my inhaler. I was a lot of no fun. I finally had to take my shoes off. Plus it RAINED! I'm really not sure why Troy loves me but this day I am very glad he does! (I am such high maintenance at times!) So onto Freeport; First off they only stop for 6 hours. Now for anyone who has been to Freeport I'm not even sure why they stop here. It is an UGLY port and anything you want to do is away from port so there is no getting off ship and walking anywhere! After the Nassau experience we opted to stay on ship. We did another smaller art auction but did not buy anything. I wanted this Kermit the Frog Painting but it was crazy $$$$. So we also hit the Adult Retreat again for some sun. Troy got a little bit of a sunburn and me I got nothing like always. This was the 2nd formal night on board so we went and did some more photos and carnival LOVES to take photos! I wish they would just give you a number and put them all on a disk and sell you the disk. Before Diner we did a Martini tasting. Just for the record I SHARED them but 8 is still a lot for me. The Berry was okay, The Mango was boring, The Grapefruit was good, The Spicy Chipolte was surprisingly good. The Pomegranate again surprisingly good, the Melon boring, the Classic was blah and the Jack was too strong for me. We both got these little prizes for this and we made a new friend, some lady who came down and starting talking to us then did the tasting as well so it was fun. Dinner again was okay. Then we saw the show this one called Jazzin it was better than the world show but not as good as the Vroom show. Sort of a salute to Jazz music and Motown. Then we went to see the Carnival Cruise line comedian and he was pretty good. He was R rated almost X rated and some parent had older kids in the audience which I don't get having teens myself (When it says adults show I figure sex jokes, props or worse) He may have been the best of the Comedians we saw. Then Christmas Eve out last full day on ship. So we played Bingo one last time had to see if we one with any of our raffle tickets, Then we watched the Christmas Show. It was very Cute and they included the kids from the ship in the show which was a nice touch and of Course Santa We did not see the show after Dinner but did go see the Comedian and he was awful, now this guy was the big name from Comedy central that they paid and I don't know why. AWFUL; He did this Soprano's type act that was NOT funny. I really can't think of anything he said that was funny. I'm not even sure how he got into comedy. Then we had to make sure we were packed early and ready to go for the arrival the next day. Now just like departure arrival went super fast. I think that is more a credit to Baltimore Harbor than to the Cruise line. Overall the cruise was great. The food could have been better, I think Troy and I are agreement that the next time we cruise we try someone new. Carnival is good for a basic cruise but too many kids! Now if you have kids (Younger than mine) then I think this is the place for you!